Ride

I was in the winter of my life and the men I met along the road were my only summer. At night I fell asleep with visions of myself dancing and laughing and crying with them. Three years down the line...and my memories of them were the only things that sustained me. And my only real happy times. 

I was a singer. Not a very popular one.

I once had dreams of becoming a beautiful poet but upon an unfortunate series of events saw those dreams dashed and divided like a millions stars in the night sky. That I wished on over and over again, sparkling and broken.  Bit I really didn't mind because I knew that it takes getting everything you ever wanted and then losing it to know what true freedom is.

When the people I used to know found out what I had been doing, how I had been living, they asked me why… But there's no use in talking to people who have a home.  They have no idea what its like to seek safety in other people. For home to be wherever you lie your head. 

I was always an unusual girl. My mother told that I had a chameleon soul. No morel compass pointing me due north. No fixed personality 

Just an inner indecisiveness that was a wide and wavering as the ocean and if i said I didn't plan for it t turn out this way I'd be lying.

Because I was born to be the other woman.

Who belonged to no one.

Who belonged to everyone

who had nothing 

Who wanted everything 

With a fire for every experience and an obsession for freedom that terrified me to the point that I couldn't even talk about it and pushed me to a nomadic point of madness that both dazzled and dizzied me. 

- Lana Del Rey

Current Mood ...

And I remember when I met him, it was so clear that

he was the only one for me.

We both knew it, right away.

And as the years went on, things got more difficult

we were faced with more challenges.

I begged him to stay. Try to remember what

we had at the beginning. He was charismatic, magnetic,

electric and everybody knew it. When he walked in

every woman's head turned, everyone stood up

to talk to him. He was like this hybrid, this mix of

a man who couldn't contain himself.

I always got the sense that he became torn

between being a good person and

missing out on all of the opportunities that life could

offer a man as magnificent as him.

And in that way I understood him

and I loved him.

I loved him, I loved him, I loved him.

And I still love him.

I love him.